If you Spot it, You got it

Ask Marcia Q & A.
Q. Have you noticed how ultra-sensitive and reactive each of us can be? Does immaturity and rudeness have to be the norm?

A. No one arrives into adulthood in one piece. For a variety of reasons, parts of us remain stuck in a developmental cul-de-sac, while other parts grow to maturity. These “deficits in maturity” as described by Alan Godwin,PsyD, are personality aspects that became delayed due to earlier times. Many people have maturity gaps or a discrepancy between their chronological age and their developmental age. Most of us grown-ups still need to grow up in some area(s) of our lives. Symptoms of depression, isolation, anxiety and active addiction often mask the stuck, immature parts that need to be identified and developed.

Healthy pro-aging involves the integration of our our Civilized self (mature, wise, responsible elder) and our Uncivilized self (youthful risk taker, creative and beautifully untamed). One clear way to identify our stuck places is to look into our current relationships. Our intimate relationships (or lack of) can reflect our level of maturity and allow countless opportunities for character growth.

Are you already thinking about someone else’s maturity gap that needs fixing?! I know, it’s easier to focus on some one else’s immature, uncultivated part(s). But you know the saying if you spot it you got it. Are you avoiding looking at your own habits of negativity, worry or moodiness?
What are they masking? What area of your life is calling for more maturity?

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